Life's Lie
by nickileahy50
Summary: If Edward never came back after New Moon. Bella contemplates her life after Edward. one-shot


**Life's Lie.**

_Life asked death, "Why do people love me but hate you?" Death responded, "Because you are a beautiful lie and I am a painful truth."_

* * *

I hate hospitals. I always have, I always will. It's not that I find them frightening or anything, it's the memories they cause me to have. They remind me of a beautiful yet tragic part of my life.

I was only seventeen. I moved to a small town in Washington called Forks to live with my father, Charlie. My mother, Renée had just got remarried to a nice young man, called Phil. They were newlyweds; so happy and in love, but I was in the way. I was causing their little paradise to become a reality. So, I decided to pack up and live with my father, Charlie. Renée tried to get me to stay but I was adamant. I was stubborn, just like my father.

So, I moved to Forks to start over. I got on well with my father. He was a quiet man, he rarely showed emotion. But I knew he loved me, just as he knew I loved him. I came back to him. After years of a lack of communication, it was nice to catch up.

When I went to school, I met Edward Cullen. We got off to a bad start but after a few months we became friends. And then we became more. We were soul mates, kindred spirits. We were so happy. But then I figured out his secret; Edward was a vampire. Despite everything, I still loved him. It didn't matter to me what he was. We were in love. We did everything together. We were rarely seen apart.

But then on my eighteenth birthday I got hurt. Edward's brother, Jasper nearly attacked me. Edward became distant. It was like he couldn't bear to look at me. Then one day his family weren't in school. I found it odd. The only time they missed school was when it was sunny, so they could go hunting. But it wasn't sunny. I became worried. I came home to find Edward waiting outside my house. He told me he wanted to go for a walk. So I followed him, into the forest. Suddenly he stopped. He turned and looked at me. He spoke in a cold voice and didn't look me in the eye. I felt like I was witnessing an out of body experience. It didn't seem real. What did feel real was the heart-wrenching pain I felt after he left. I cried and cried, until there were no more tears left. My heart was broken and irreparable.

I spent months barely living, I was just existing. Time flew by without me even noticing. I couldn't eat, sleep, anything. I was like a robot. It must have been terrifying for my friends and family to see me like that. It wasn't that I was upset over some petty crush. I was heartbroken over a future I would never be able to have. I always believed I would have forever with Edward, but I barely got a year. Edward never came back, just like he said. He told me it would be like he never existed, but he was wrong. He would never be able to take away my love for him.

I did find someone eventually. I went to college, got a degree and became an English teacher. I met Derek in class. We began dating. We were smitten. I fell in love with him. I told him about Edward and the Cullens, but never of their secret. I felt that if I ever told someone it would be as if I was giving away Edward. He would be a part of me forever, and I didn't want anyone to take that away. Besides, it was never my secret to tell.

Derek and I got married when I was twenty-three. Two years later, we had a son. His name was Anthony. He was a beautiful boy. My chocolate brown hair and his father's bright blue eyes. He was such a happy child. When he was three I found out I was pregnant with our daughter, Alicia. She was born with her father's blonde curls and my chocolate eyes. I loved my children. They were everything to me. They grew up and went to college. Anthony studied medicine and Alicia studied fashion. When Anthony was twenty-five he came home with a girlfriend, Natasha. They soon got married and had twins, Jason and Janelle. Alicia came home engaged, to a lovely young man called Jeffrey. They had three children; a girl, Brooke, and two boys, Reese and Reed. I loved my grandchildren so much; I spoiled them rotten, much to their parents disdain.

Derek died at the age of ninety-one. I was eighty-nine. I mourned, just as a wife should. But I never cried, oddly enough. It seemed to me that I cried all of my tears that day in the forest. I would always love Derek. He was my husband, my true love. He fixed me when I was broken. He helped me to live, to breathe.

Leaving the cemetery that day I had an odd sense of nostalgia. I looked over my shoulder and saw a woman walking towards me. She looked to be about twenty, but her sparkling topaz eyes said otherwise. She stopped in front of me and held my frail hand in her perfectly manicured one.

"Isabella, I am terribly sorry for your loss. I wish I could turn back time and bring the both of you back together." She said softly.

I looked up at her and smiled sadly, "Rosalie, we all make mistakes. My eighteenth birthday may have been one, but we both know that it was bound to happen."

She nodded and let go of my hand. We just stared at each other, trying to figure out what the other was thinking. I never asked about the others and she never asked about my family. It was a sign – we had both forgiven each other.

"Isabella, I always saw you as a sister. I am so terribly sorry." She cried.

"I forgive you, Rosalie." And then a tear fell from my eye, the first one in seventy-one years.

Then she was gone, as if she never existed. It was tragic and yet beautiful at the same time. I knew she was going back to the Cullens. But I didn't want to see them. I didn't want them to see me old and weak. I wanted them to remember me as the fiery young woman that had captured Edward's heart.

Ten years after Derek's death I became ill. I knew I was dying. I asked to be sent to Forks General Hospital. I knew they would be there. As I lay in the bed, on the eve of my 100th birthday, I realised that despite all the heartbreak and sadness I endured, I also got a happy ending. I fell in love with an amazing man, had two beautiful children and got to see my grandchildren grow.

There's a knock at my door.

"Come in." I say quietly.

And in he walks, my Edward. He closes the door behind him and smiles at me sadly. He looks different, yet the same. His clothes are more modern than mine. His hair is the same, messy and all over the place. His face is as handsome as always. But it's his eyes that catch my attention. They look more aged than they have ever been.

"Hello, Edward." I whisper, because I know he can hear me.

"Hello, Bella." He says quietly.

"What can I do for you?" I ask gently.

"Bella, I am sorry. I know I told you I would never come back, but I had to. I had to see you one more time. I'm sorry, love." He seems pained.

"Edward, there is no need to apologise. I forgave you a long time ago. Now I think it's time you forgive yourself." I say to him kindly.

He chuckles, music to my ears. "Alice said you would say that."

I smile, "How are they?"

"Good, I guess. Rosalie has been happier ever since she saw you ten years ago. And Alice was delighted when she saw your daughter graduate with a degree in fashion. Carlisle was immensely proud when he found out your son is a doctor. Emmett is becoming himself again. He was distraught when we left, he always saw you as his sister. Esme is so proud of you. She always saw you as a daughter." He says.

"What about you?" I ask him.

"I'm okay. To be honest, I miss you. I love you." He cries.

"I love you too, Edward." I whisper, because I have no more strength.

I'm fading. I close my eyes as he kisses my forehead lightly and whispers.

"Happy birthday, Bella."


End file.
